Into the Wild Unknown
A few months ago I went on a personal retreat with my coach. I was largely on this personal retreat because I'm going through this big transition in my life and I knew I needed to let some things go and create something new. My coach set up a custom experience for me and part of that included working with horses.
Now, if you're like me, and you don't know much about horses, let me tell you what was explained to me -- horses are prey animals so they are always on the lookout for potential danger. One of the ways they register safety is when someone's being is congruent. When you show up and your insides match your outsides they feel safe. If you're incongruent, they don't feel safe and they'll let you know it through their interaction with you. It's a really amazing opportunity to get your energy reflected back to you through the horses.
One of the exercises the facilitator had us do is cleaning out their horseshoe. She explained how to reach down their leg, pinch in a certain place so they'll pick up their foot, hold the foot and clean it with the tool and then set it back down. Sounds pretty simple, right?
I go first -- I bend over, run my hand down the horse’s leg and begin to squeeze where she instructed me to. I squeeze and squeeze and squeeze. The horse is not picking up his foot. I keep squeezing. He does not pick up its foot. At one point, I kind of slumped over and wondered, should I give up or keep squeezing?
Finally, the facilitator tells me to stand back up. I stand back up. And then, she notices my shirt. My shirt says love each other. She says Oh, and look at her shirt, love each other. You know, it's really great to love each other and be nice, unless it's a pattern where you're being nice, but you're not being clear.
As soon as she said it, I started crying. I could instantly see the places in my life where I was really nice or really loving but I wasn't clear. I could see how my ambiguity often gets in the way of really having what I want and had certainly contributed to my current life situation.
That experience shifted the energy for me completely. I left that weekend in a completely different energy. I gave up being nice on behalf of being clear which I also recognize now is kind. Clear is kind. I don't need to be nice. What people deserve and what I deserve is to be clear. I've taken that into my work relationships, my friendships, and all other interactions I've had since. Let me tell you, it's made a big difference!
There's a way that my results are predictable when I'm being nice. It's a little scarier to forget nice and just be clear! But, it's totally working. I have this sense of freedom in my relationships because there's not any of that ambiguous, tiptoeing around, being cautious, kind of bullshit. There's just straightforward, clear communication. And it's so refreshing! It's exactly the energy I needed to move into this new phase of my life.
If you're stuck in a pattern and you recognize it's not working but you're not really sure what needs to shift -- it might be the perfect opportunity for you to step into a retreat space. Retreats are one of the reliable places I go when something in my life needs to move.
I'm holding a retreat in the Dallas area January 15, 16 & 17. It includes a horse experience which I can't wait to share with you! The retreat is called Into the Wild Unknown because that's what it's like when you leave behind a default pattern or way of being and step into a completely new energy without any guarantees of how things will turn out.
If you want to create something new for your future then you've got to have new energy. You must be willing to step into unknown territory. If your heart is saying, oh, yep, that's for me!, then click the button below to apply and I'll be in touch with you soon.
To freedom!